Filmmaker & Photographer London, UK


My not so secret diary

Busy in the 'Dam'

It's safe to say i'm busy. It's also safe to say I never want to be this busy again. I'm simultaneously in pre production on two videos that need shooting in the next week, filming every day for the fanfest videos & worldwide promotion adverts, and post production every day/night for multiple projects. I'm also trying to write, when I get time, a treatment for a music video I thought of the other day. I blabbed it out to Joe on our way to the venue in Lyon a few days ago and he really liked it, telling me we just need to work out which song suits it best.

A lot of people on twitter sometimes confuse my busyness with gratification, or should I say lack of gratification for what I get to do as my 'job'. I think in some peoples minds I just get to travel and see lots of shows. Which if you were layering a cake, is the very final icing you lay on top (I don't bake, so maybe should have asked my girlfriend Sophie about this one before using it as my analogy). So much goes on behind the scenes that when I have, on various occassions tried to chart my day minute by minute, I can't. I get too busy for that about an hour after waking up. I'm working for a band that are now Internationally recognised, that means all those countries need videos, all those countries need photo's even before we arrive. It's great fun, and I wouldn't swop it for anything, but, it leaves me extremely busy and being organised is the only option. I was asked a few days ago, how do I stay motivated. I answered as simply as I think about such a thing, "I decide whether I want to move forwards or backwards." 

Sometimes I feel like the wheels are turning but i'm going nowhere, as i'm certain many people do. I think it comes from shooting mostly in a documentary fashion. Day to day I don't really know what's going to happen, sometimes something great happens and from that I make an edit that I love and enjoy, other days (yesterday being a prime example) the band might be tired, or their schedule dictates we cant film much, and I feel almost lost, like I haven't produced anything great. I need to remind myself on those days it's not my fault and that it really is completely out of my control at times. That's when it is time to change gears. How do I do that. I switch off from work. I might watch my favourite TV series for a few hours. I might go for a walk, I might just play with my cat for a bit or turn on my playstation. At some point in that time, i'll change gear, and it comes from nowhere, out of the blue, intrinsically, something ignites within me and within minutes, i'll be back at my desk moving forwards again. I think that comes from working as a creative. You simply cannot be producing your best 24/7, you HAVE to 'switch off', and it's in that time I re-ignite my senses. 

I need a few hours to change gear, right now.